Any Day, Any Food

My son will kick your son's ass in an eating contest. I would tell you my son can eat faster than any human his age, but I'm not sure that's correct, because I've trained a beast! I know you're too much of a pussy to try my techniques, so I'll indulge you.

Some times I won't let him eat for two days. Then I'll put him in a room with a table full of food, and tell him he only has ten minutes to eat. You've never seen anyone eat so fast. He'll set a slower pace today, but he'll still wipe the floor with your excuse for a son.

The name of the game is watermelons today, punk. My son's stomach can hold two full watermelons easily. That's not even a factor. What we've been working on is spitting seeds, hahaha. Right now he can make it in a cup ten feet away. He made seven in a row last night. They got a bucket here for seeds, little bigger target.

Why don't you tell him to aim for your big mouth.

Oh, well that does it! After this competition, I'm gonna get my son to bite off your dick!
-AC