Wednesday, April 25, 2007

WTF

So I recently found out my luck is shit. I have officially been expelled from college, Whoopididoo! Fuck it , my dreams of one day being the first man to land on uranus, and makeing the first faux paus joke about it being gasious and full of alien lifeforms has been crushed. I know I'm taking this rather light, but this is supossed to be a blog of humorous proportions. So, where do I see myself in the next 5 years, CASTODIAN fool, and yabba zabba will be my only friend, for all you half baked fans out there. On a happier note, I was able to have sex for 2 hours, a record for me as of late. I acomplished this by, naturally, thinking about baseball, but that didn't help, God damn that Sammy Sosa and that sweet ass of his. I switched from baseball to the Austin Powers method, Margaret Thatcher naked on a cold day, but that only reinforced my granny fetish. Then I came, fucking Margaret Thatcher and her, come to think of it I don't really know who she is, but fuck her anyway, oh and I would. Yes my expulsion has put a damper on just about everything for me as of late, but I went out like a true badass. My last words were of course, "Fuck Penn State, and fuck you too" after stating this I walked through a garden and trampled some plants, fucka chlorophyll. As Ed Norton would say, I wanted to destroy something beautiful, and I did, but the plants couldn't really fight back. So this one goes out to all my homies for being there when I needed you. It was all over some weed too, 1.2 grams to be exact, or as the police described it "A vegtable like substance," hey genious if it looks like weed, and smells like weed, it's fucking weed. This last request goes out to our singular overobsessed fan, if you should happen to come across a police officer with the last name Gelgot, fuking stab him in the jugular, then rape his dog, it's a simple request, oh and send pictures.

1 Comments:

Blogger CrimsonKing2000 said...

Oh, that sucks! Can you ever go to another college again?

6:18 PM  

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